Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Lover
Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Lover
Even if he was insanely intent on shooting his wife and lover...I doubt he'd succeed. Unless his name was Lazarus.
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
Hm. Bet he's right.
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Talk about police brutality.
Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
What a guy!
Miners Refuse to Work after Death
Lazy SOBs.
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
That'll probably be cheaper than a fair trial.
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
Red tape must be stronger than duct tape.
Cold Wave Liked to Temperatures
Duh.
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
I guess they weren't fat enough.
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
This is absolutely true. They taste like chicken.
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
Serves them right, the dummies.
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
Hey, they can start a basketball team with two on the bench!
And my personal favorite:
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
Proofreading is a dying art. I will be passing along some Proofreading and Editing Tips compiled from experienced proofreaders and editors over the next few posts. The topics:
General Pips for Troofing. Content Editing or Editing for Content. Proofreader Preparation-H(elper)
General Pips for Troofing
- Read it aloud and silently. (Just not at the same time.)
- Read it backwards to focus on the spelling words. (No, don't put the paper behind your head.)
- Use a spell checker and grammar checker as a first screener, but don't depend on them. (It's a machine!)
- Have someone else read it. (Someone over ten-years old.)
- Read slowly. (Drinking Tequila probably will help, but it's not advisable.)
- Use a mask. (No, I don't mean Zorro; it's a blank sheet of paper to cover the unproofed material.)
- Point with your finger to read one word at a time. (It doesn't matter which finger--go with how you feel: first finger if you're feeling confident; middle finger if you're feeling aggressive; third finger if you're feeling awkward; and pinky finger if, like me, you're holding a Hershey's bar with the other fingers.)
Content Editing or Editing for Content
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Ask yourself who, what, when, where, why, and how when reading for content. Does the text answer all the questions you think it should?
- Highlight the sentences that best answer these questions, just so you can see if the facts flow in logical order.
Proofreader Preparation-H(elper)
- Write at the end of the day; edit first thing in the morning. (Golfing between won't help.)
- Listen to music or chew gum. Not much is as boring as proofing and you won't need much critical thinking, though it does require extreme focus and concentration. Anything that relieves some of the pressure, while allowing you to still keep focused, will benefit you. (Except phone sex.)
More to come!
Ahh, yes - titles of newspaper articles.
Sometimes I think newspaper writers just throw some colorful words together to make a title - words that will remind you of the topic you first heard about yesterday.
"Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges" sounds more interesting than "Bureacracy Stops Construction Project".
What's interesting is that it works. I wonder if we read titles simply as a series of keywords.
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Yes, titles are keywords that are supposed to hook the reader into reading the article, but they are supposed to accurately and concisely state what you are about to read. I doubt that the guy who came up with "Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges" did so to make the reader picture red tape actually holding up a bridge as a pun of some sort. It was a lazy editor who was probably too rushed or too hungover to pay attention to what he was reading.
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